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Posts Tagged ‘feel good’

I’m Directing This Flick

Tuesday, April 1st, 2014

Today is my favorite day of the year. The freshness of Spring is in the air, the birds are chirping, and, oh yes, today is also my Birthday.

As a child I never knew if the day would be spent playing outside with friends on the verdant, newly sprouted grass or cozied up inside with a round of hot chocolate for all as the early Spring winds blew whirlwinds of white snow off the two foot high snow banks outside. If I was still living in the north, this year I would be drinking hot chocolate today.

It’s a time of year full of surprises. Of course there are the April Fool’s Day pranks. My Grandmother would not believe it when my Dad told her my Mother had given birth to me. “I know what day it is,” she skeptically replied.

No joke. Here I am. And on this first day of the rest of my life, I’ve decided on a theme for the next 59 years.

“My life is a feel good movie of my own direction.” 

That means I choose to not include the drama, the tragedy and the fear that are part of all the other movies that people choose to live in everyday.

“But it’s not my fault,” is the common explanation on the lips of the victims of circumstances. Yes, it is easier to blame another for what happens in your life. When you do that, you give up your own control. Would you let someone push you out of the driver’s seat of your car and recklessly careen down the road? Of course not.

Your Life. It is Your Life.

Why allow someone else to drive you where you don’t want to go?

Nothing is more important than that you feel good. Like a feel good movie you want to see over and over again.

“Today, no matter where I am going, no matter what I am doing, no matter whom I am doing it with…nothing is more important than that I feel good.”  Abraham- Esther & Jerry Hicks

Doesn’t It Feel Good?

Thursday, November 8th, 2012

If you wanted to make someone feel good, how would you accomplish that? Instead of trying to imagine what another person would enjoy, think first about what makes you feel good.

Everyone has their peculiarities. They like mustard on pretzels. Or prefer the color green instead of red. Wine tops beer every time. But consider the similarities we share. What makes you feel good?

      Being called by your name.

      Getting a sincere compliment.

      Receiving an unexpected gift.

All simple gestures that feel wonderful and boost you self esteem. What everyone likes is to be noticed and appreciated. How many times in your day could you make the effort to remember someone's name and repeat it back to them? When you notice that a person looks great wearing a particular color, why not tell them? Next time you see a little something in the store and think to yourself, "she would love that," add it to your purchases and make her day.

What do you like?

To feel good. Pass it on.


"Too often we underestimate the power of a touch, a smile, a kind word, a listening ear, an honest compliment, or the smallest act of caring, all of which have the potential to turn a life around"

Leo Buscaglia

What Color Is the Rain?

Monday, August 20th, 2012

Is it raining where you are today? If it is, check what color you’re wearing. Akin to the sensation of Seasonal Affective Disorder, weather induced mood changes often determine the color of clothing you reach for in your closet.

Before moving to the Sunshine state, my husband’s favorite color and normal color of choice for his shirts was yellow. It suits him. He’s a sunny kind of guy. He owns twelve yellow shirts, last count.

If the day was cloudy and dreary, he would put on a blue shirt instead of his usual yellow. Not a conscious choice, mind you. He was just experiencing a less than sunny feeling and acting on that feeling by picking blue to wear. No wonder he dreaded rainy days.

Thankfully, he had me to make this observation and call it to his attention. (You’re welcome, dear.) Now, on a rare rainy day, he says he must wear a yellow shirt to counteract the gloominess of the weather. Ah, a color victory!

How do feelings about colors show up in your life? The two most commonly worn colors on rainy days are gray and black. Not exactly party wear, these two hues of gloom are not flattering to the face or uplifting to the psyche.

To create a base color for your wardrobe, these basics are fine, as long as you add more color when you wear them. As a singular color, you’ll look as dull as the Grim Reaper and boring to boot.

That’s not the real you, even on a rainy day. It’s great to feel the color you wear if it means something positive to you.

If the color’s meaning produces a negative feeling for you- Here’s a tip for success- Don’t wear that color!


"And when it rains on your parade, look up rather than down. Without the rain, there would be no rainbow. "
Gilbert K. Chesterton

Late or Lingering

Thursday, August 16th, 2012

Late summer….I've heard that description of the season so many times this week. But it's only mid August. 

Back in the day, the lazy days of summer lasted until school started, always after Labor Day. Technically summer ends on the Autumnal Equinox during the third week of September. That's more than a month away. 

So what's the rush?

Is it a symptom of our obsession with the future?

When not lamenting days gone by, our thoughts turn to what's to come. We assemble a cast of people, scenery and events that we believe will or could happen.

Real or imagined future, our thoughts manifest as the feelings we experience. Are you looking forward to something with happy anticipation? Those future thoughts feel good. 

Most commonly our thought projections of the future turn into feelings of anxiety or dread. We rehearse the scene of our upcoming performance over and over, perfecting feelings that do not feel good.

That's not the way champions rehearse their future. They imagine only the best for themselves, and use the present moment to perfect their craft.

Why not savor each delicious day of summer that's left? You have thirty six days to go.

Pick a summer activity for each of these golden days and practice living in the now. It may be sitting in your yard with a refreshing drink. Take a walk and notice the verdant green and touches of gold in the trees. Put your bare feet in the sand. Watch a magnificent sunset.

Do all those things that mean summer to you. What will it be? I haven't run through the sprinkler….yet.

It's not late summer….it's lingering.

Enjoy this Day!

It is the summer's great last heat,
It is the fall's first chill: They meet.
–Sarah Morgan Bryan Piatt

Are You a Color Victim?

Tuesday, August 14th, 2012


Jennifer eagerly surveys a well stocked display table piled high with the season's newest sweaters. The soft textures and assortment of colors entice her to select several sweaters to try on. She scoops them up and hurries off to the fitting room.

The red one, the blue one, the pink, the green, each is lovelier than the last. Jennifer's shoulder length, sandy colored hair and creamy skin are perfectly suited for vibrant color. How will she make her choice?

Pam, the sales associate, helpfully comments to Jennifer as she stands before the mirror, “That one brings out the color of your eyes.” 

 “Hmm, she's right about that,” Jennifer nods. The cerulean blue reminds her of the ocean she visited on her tropical vacation last year. Her eyes sparkle as they reflect the soothing blue.

“That's a great color with your skin tone”, Pam adds as Jennifer models another sweater. 

“Yes, I do feel more cheerful in this color.” The chili pepper red color makes her face glow. She stands a little taller as she admires her striking reflection.

Back in the fitting room, Jennifer slowly redresses as she considers her choices. “I like them all,” then she hesitantly admits, “I just don't know which color is really me.”

Returning the pile of sweaters back to the display table, Jennifer has a single selection in hand. 

Pam is surprised as she processes the transaction. “How did you select that one?” she asks Jennifer, and muses to herself, “What is she thinking?”

Jennifer just smiles and shrugs in reply, “I wear a lot of this color.” Leaving the store, shopping bag in hand, she admonishes herself and sighs, “I did it again, another beige sweater”. 


Sound familiar? Is Jennifer just being practical by making a neutral color choice, or is she withholding from herself an opportunity for success? 

Everyone has their own individual atmosphere. Like each flower has its distinctive aroma, we each have things about us that make us memorable. One of those things is color.

What we see, we remember. Color is what we most easily see. Describe the person across the room from you. Invariably you will mention the color of their complexion, clothing, eyes, or hair. All of these colorful attributes create your personal atmosphere.

You create the colorscape around you. The colors you wear, the colors you surround yourself with in your home, your work area, even the vehicle you drive are a result of you actively choosing your environment.

To control your own colorscape, first become comfortable with color and what colors mean to you. Learn how color evokes a mood. Discover your own best colors, and surround yourself with the colors that are right for you.

Feel good about color and color will keep you feeling good.

Are you drawn to a color, yet not giving yourself permission to wear it or live with it? Your level of confidence, your decisiveness, your values, are all manifested through color.

If you're holding yourself back from color, in what other ways are you limiting yourself?


"There are no limitations to the mind except those we acknowledge."

Napoleon Hill 

What Could Be Simpler?

Saturday, August 11th, 2012

What does a simpler life and making more discerning life choices have to do with color? Perspective. We're blessed with a myriad of color choices in every part of life, from toothbrushes to paint colors. 

Does that dizzying array of choices make your life simpler? Ever long for the days of a single color option- a black phone, solid white sheets, red lipstick? 

How do you choose color? 

Do you pick the popular hue? If you see it on the fashion runways and on the celebrity red carpet it's a sure bet that hot color will be yours for the choosing on clothing racks, furniture, even on cars in the near future.

Opting for the latest trend, just like signing on for yet another life experience, may be taking you away from your true self. Color has personal meaning for each of us and has an effect on how you feel about yourself.

When you wear a color that speaks to you, or you're surrounded by your best colors in your home or work environment, your spirits are lifted, you look and feel your best.

Your color creates a glow from the inside out.

Check your closet for a reoccurring color. (Disregard your black clothing. That's another topic.) You will naturally be drawn to a color that feels good to you.

What color gets you compliments when you wear it? What color chair do you choose to sit in when entering a room? Listen to your color intuition.

Color trends are commonly followed by those unwilling to be themselves. See the proof by noticing people in the media or on the streets. Who do you think found “their color” and who is the victim of a trend? 

Isn't life all about self discovery and finding what satisfies you? 

The more I learn and study about the effects of color, I am convinced the outer environment we create for ourselves mirrors the image of our inner selves.

Are you guarded or shy around others?

Are you always looking for approval? 

By your appearance, clothing, work and home environments, you declare to the world your level of self acceptance.

Success starts with how you see yourself. 

Live simply. Reflect your best self with color that says YOU.

How Is Your Immunity?

Friday, August 10th, 2012

Have you ever asked someone, “How are you today?” and they actually told you? If that's the case, it probably wasn't a positive response.

I once knew a woman who was always eager to share her pain. Most of the time, I listened and nodded with an empathetic look on my face. After our conversation I would feel emotionally drained and feeling down myself.

Eventually, I learned to no longer ask that leading question and began the conversation by complimenting her on how well she looked.

That simple shift of perspective would often lead to a more positive interaction. She felt better about herself and I felt relieved by not being part of her negative focus. If our conversation eventually returned to irresolvable health matters, I excused myself until our next meeting.

There is a fine line between feeling empathy for others and protecting your own well being. Contagious negative energy spreads faster than the common cold.

Of course you cannot live in a social bubble, especially in this age of immediate communication and interactions with a global community. Purveyors of doom and gloom are no longer limited to face to face conversations. 

When you are exposed to the viruses of pessimism, disdain, and intolerance, your resistance is weakened.

So how do you build up your immunity from the disease of negativity?

  •    Realize everyone creates their own reality. Do not adopt someone else's reality.
  •    Offer a proactive solution to the problem. Be prepared to be ignored.
  •    Smile and say a prayer for them.
  •    Walk away (or Unfriend).

Any interactions affecting your well being, be your own best friend and protect your positive attitude.

You deserve to feel great!

What Color Is Your Summer?

Thursday, July 19th, 2012

Summer is the heady season that pushes beyond the pastel lilacs, greens and yellows we enjoyed in spring. Nature’s summer palette is rich and color saturated. The greens are deep and velvety like a carpet of sod. The reds are poppy bright. Blue is crisp as a cloudless sky.

It’s no coincidence our stars & stripes holiday is commemorated in July when the blueberry and raspberry hues are plentiful.

So, why are you still wearing in basic black? I know, it’s easy.

Never need to think about what to wear.

What if Mother Nature felt the same way as you? The earth would still be dark and frozen under gray clouded skies.

This is the season to let go of basic black and feel good about wearing color.

Wearing color makes your skin tone brighter and your eyes sparkle.

Most importantly, you feel better in color!


Push aside the colorless items in the front of your closet.

Let's do some treasure hunting.

What will we find?

That slightly sheer, deep rose colored blouse. Bought it for a wedding, never to be worn again.

This is the time of year that every day is festive- it’s summer!

Layer the blouse, unbuttoned, over a white camisole or tank. You’ll look fresh & summery and your forgotten blouse will have a renewed life.


What other “finds” are tucked away in your closet? A sundress?

No time like the present for that. Top it with a light weight cardigan or shawl for cooler indoor venues.


A pair of patterned pants? Prints are fun for summer. Add a coordinating, solid color, long shirt.

Don’t tuck it in, but belt it. Part of the pattern will be hidden beneath the shirt and you’ll create a slimming silhouette for yourself.


If black you must wear, take the opportunity to accent with color.

Scarves are in. You probably have a drawer full or know someone who does.

Promise yourself to wear a different scarf every day for a week. Flowers one day, batik the next. How many looks can you create? 

Remember how brilliantly those fireworks appeared against the dark evening sky?

Create that same color magic with your black wardrobe by adding refreshing, vibrant summertime color.

Pass those berries!

The Magic Power of Color

Sunday, July 15th, 2012

“I like to wear bright colors, but I’m unsure which colors look good on me.

How do I know what color will make me look my best?”

It’s as easy as looking in your mirror. But instead of asking yourself, “Does this color look good on me?” ask the question, “How does this color make me feel?”

Color speaks to our emotions and those emotions we describe as feelings. When you are experiencing a positive emotion, you would say you’re feeling happy. When you’re emotionally touched at the end of a tragic movie, you feel sad.

Try on a color and pay attention to the feeling that surfaces. Wearing your “favorite” color, you’ll no doubt feel happy because you associate that color with a positive emotion. A color that has a negative emotion attached to it, maybe the color of a uniform you were forced to wear, will leave you feeling uneasy wearing that color.

If a color brings up no particular feelings, good or bad, you may look fine in the color, but you won’t feel your best. Select colors that make you feel good. You’ll smile at your reflection and carry that confident feeling throughout the day.

That’s the Magic Power of Color.

Day Two of the 30 Day Gratitude Challenge

Wednesday, June 13th, 2012

Didn't that feel great to tell your special someone how you feel about them yesterday? Remember that what you give out always comes back to you. Get ready to feel the love.

But what about today, day two? Who will you tell that you are grateful for them being in your life? The person that came to mind for me is a neighbor who always volunteers to take us to the airport when we travel. And he's always there to pick us up when we return, too.

I have offered to take him to lunch or dinner, he says no. I bought him a Denny's gift certificate and left it in his car (one of his favorite places for breakfast). He tried to give it back to me. I insisted that he use it for himself or for a friend.

What do you do when someone will not accept your thanks? Send them a Thank You card. The cards I have sent to him are displayed in his apartment.

He cannot give back a heartfelt card. Instead he cherishes it.

What a simple gesture to reinforce his self worth.

Now who are you thinking of?

Go here and them send a card.

It feels so good!

Tell Me More

Mary Ellen Lapp reveals how the colors we wear, and the colors that surround us, even the color of the car we drive, impact out self image and affects how we are seen by the people around us.

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Feel Great in Color!